My Wife's Holidays

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My Wife’s Holidays by Quinapalus

A well-known joke runs as follows:

– I say, I say, I say, my wife’s gone to the West Indies on holiday.

– Jamaica?

– No, she went of her own accord.

In the examples that follow, only the last lines are given: solvers are required to invent suitable first lines (which they should preferably keep to themselves) and second lines, which should be entered in the grid wherever they will fit. In each case the grid entry is a geographical proper name. Other clues are normal and Chambers (1998) is recommended except for 44 (in OED). Punctuation may mislead. For the purposes of the puzzle, my wife lives in London.

diagram

Holiday clues

Phwoar! She certainly is!
No, I let her take her time
Of course, we’ve been married over 30 years
No, she injured her leg
Yes, completely bonkers
Yes, we waited behind someone for ages
About five thousand miles in fact
Yes, it was rather pleasant
No, Rhythm and Blues
Yes, she was coughing for weeks
Yes, but we put a bandage over it
No, we’re still happily married
Yes, terrible. And the musicians were worse!
No, they let her in the passenger cabin

Normal clues

Across

1 Bandage cut and leave on ground (6)
10 Clear sound of dislodged rider (7)
14 Anyone taking on leaders of national gangs is inexperienced (5)
16 Supply money to e.g. parasites (4)
17 Shake, having forgotten lines in middle section of performance (4)
18 Oil company back in Lesotho (they may appear thus) (6)
20 Variegate with figures, paired off (6)
26 Most unlikely model (4)
30 Italian lady’s good-for-nothing, not a hint of tenacity (5)
31 Smarter than average, bear constant flying - that involves concentration (5)
33 Distribute luncheon vouchers among dipsos, residents of Bratislava? (7)
35 Joint (American) with gravy (3)
39 Genuine measuring instrument, Scots, not Welsh (4)
42 Occasion when one leaves voluptuous woman (4)
44 Senior executive officer in power to wind up business (8, two words)
45 Checks timbers (squared) (5)

Down

1 Pointer held by twisty leash (5)
2 The person that, on piano, produces inspiration (noisy) (5)
3 One hundred voices (when accompanied by Shetland viols) (3)
4 Urges? Sounds like they’re over! (4)
6 Sent message through ether with electric current in upturned tree - much praised (7)
7 Constituent of peat, tarry substance, smelly, from e.g. Bulgaria (5)
8 Two thirds of three hundred complain (4)
9 Raise crumbling house (5)
13 Brief Encounter’s in favour with film-star-like characters? No chance! (10)
19 Smooth quality of bit of iguana (less skin) puréed (9)
22 Give birth to bairn (not the first) (3)
23 Heavens! Attendant’s to try to divert ’plane (7)
25 Beautiful trees in Sierra Leone: a source of joy (7)
26 E.g. hunk of garlic one dispensed with: it’s a kindness (4)
28 It’s designated ‘R’ or ‘blue’ after editing (6)
29 They measure currents, and chaos in flow, following bit of turbulence (6)
32 See hero on TV hospital drama apply fluid (5)
34 Dull-coloured oriental fruit with bit of husk inside (5)
36 Near equator, under sun, warming gently (4)
38 Blank panels (?) one’s shifted in service (4)
40 Hug colleague (4)
43 Passage that’s good, apparently (3)


This page most recently updated Sat 16 Sep 16:09:15 BST 2017
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